This Made Me Think….

and wonder if it was true. I read a blog that stated that women in America basically emasculate men by making fun of them in public to the point that the husband gets mad and walks away, or makes a rude comment. I found myself thinking about this and wondering if it is something that I do in my life.
I’m sure that I have been guilty of this, however I think there are also times when this is just truth. There are things about men and women that are just funny. That basically across the board men and women do. We are different…and finding humor in that is better in my eyes than being angry or trying to make someone more like ourselves.
There are times that we can cross the line, where we don’t talk openly about things and I think this is were the problem comes in. As a culture we are trying to make men into something that God did not intend for them to be.
I am a firm believer that women are not invaluable and have a “lower” place than what men have in God’s eyes. But I also thinks there’s reason why men are to be the leaders, of the church and of the family.
Do I think this means women can’t lead?
Absolutely not!!! I was a born leader. I am smart and I know God and I have a relationship with him that I believe is valid and that deserves the right to be shared. Not only with women but with men too.
I have to believe that there is a reason that God made man to be the leaders. The older I get the more I think that it’s for their ability to be logical, and to seperate themselves from a given situation. It’s like their brains are compartmentalized, and they can put bad things in one area and they are not so effected by them. Does that mean they don’t have feelings? I don’t believe so, I believe it means that they can think easier without feelings.
Of course I speak in generalities. This is not the case for every women or every man. And that’s ok too.
I like the show Wife Swap..ya ya I know…let’s move on. Recently I watched a rerun where there was a great debate about a man being the one who stayed home with the kids and did house work(by his choice). I found myself wondering about that. I don’t think that it says in the Bible the man must go out and make the money. And I wonder if it truelly does make him less of a leader to stay at home.
I realize that for the most part, in our culture and society, that our answer is yes. But I’m not talking about what culture says. I’m talking about what God thinks. In the end isn’t He what matters anyway.
I have a great respect for a man that stays at home. I think it is possible to do this and still lead your family. Still be the head of the household and lead your family towards a better relationship with God. We have gotten to the point where society tries to say that men and women are equal.
I agree with that to a point. I agree that men and women can do the same things, and many people can do many things better than other, male or female. But, we have young men that take no responsibility for their families, their lives, much less their children, and I wonder if that’s not because we’ve taught them, as a society, that they really aren’t necessary for the world to keep spinning. I find this very sad.
If you have ever been around children much you can see this. I can spend my days trying to discipline my children and often I just end up fighting with them. My husband can come home and say four or five words and the kids scatter, or they stop talking, or whatever, and he doesn’t even have to yell. I believe it’s something in the man’s voice. Something about the male voice puts a fear in children. Not necessarily a fear of being hurt, but they don’t want to disappoint or let down the male figures in their lives. My Dad for example…he’s kind of big and scary. But on the rare occsion he gets onto my kids, they cry and get scared and it really impacts them. In a way that I never am able to scare them. I’m the Mommy, I’m the nurturer and the lover, even when they know I’m serious it’s still not the same as that male role model.
I have been around a lot of young men. There are many good ones, many that want to do the right thing. Simply don’t know how and we have backed our men, our husbands into such a corner that their impact doesn’t go as far as it once did. Sometimes there is an element of just do what your told. But most likely it’s not out of being inferior(as a women) it’s about it being the right logical decision that we are so often not able to make. I go with my heart.
Nine times out of ten if you ask why I did this or that, it’s because my heart said so. As I get older I am trying to use my brain more, but my heart still wins out. It is a gift something that was given to me, and something that I can not deny or supress. I have tried, it just makes me myserable. So I am trying to learn that there are times when I just need to listen to my husband and do what he thinks we should do. Not because he is better than me, but because he is using his head. It also goes the other way. We make our men feel like we are treating them like children.
If we want them to trust us and take what we say seriously, then we have to give them the space to prove to them that we don’t see them as children and that they can trust our instincts on things.
We have to give them room to be the leader and try to help them get there. There is a sense of satisfaction when you can stand back and say I had a hand in that situation. He trusted me and we’re the better for it. Plus, your children get to see their father shine. They get to see him stand up and do the right thing. They get to see you working together as a team. I believe this is so important.
Children should be taught that we are together in this. Not that man is better or women is better, but that together with trust and love we can make anythign happen. We will get closer to God, we will find a way to deal with the struggles of life. And most important that a relationship is about giving and taking, and about the man stepping up and doing what is right even when it’s hard or doesn’t make sense. And sometimes yes that means stepping out on faith and trusting that what their wife has to say is something that is valid and should be listened to.
Being a wife isn’t about cooking and cleaning and having babies. It’s about building your husband up, watching him become a leader and what God wants him to be. And helping him to get there with the kindest heart possible. Being a husband is about taking a stand and loving his family first before anything else, well besides God. Trying to lead his family to God and never giving up that God is there and that he will raise them up.
Just some of my random thoughts…probably didn’t word it well. Sorry. Have a blessed day!